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Should I Change My Last Name After Marriage?

Modern Love

Posted on March 22 2018

Should I change my last name after marriage?

On last names…

As my wedding date got closer, I found myself sitting in a bar with my fiancé googling alternatives to a woman taking a man’s last name. What brought us to consult a search engine when trying to make a fairly big decision? Good question.

This was one in a series of many conversations on the issue – the fact that it remained a respectful conversation rather than an argument no matter how many times we reached an impasse made me all the more confident that I had found my person.

In case you’re wondering, as per Google there are several approaches to last names after marriage:

  • Both of you assume one partner’s last name
  • One or both partners hyphenate their names
  • Both partners keep their last names
  • Partners merge their last names to create a new one (e.g. Smith and Perry become Sherry)

As we debated the merits of each option over a few beers, I felt grateful for the ability to have the conversation. Modern love is about feeling empowered to choose which traditions feel right to you, and giving up my last name didn’t feel right to me. If assuming your significant other’s last name feels right to you – we support you in that decision. If it means shedding your 35-letter *completely unpronounceable* maiden name, then goodbye Ms. Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorff, hello Mrs. Lee! Good riddance!

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